Now What?

A feeling of uncertainty and being overwhelmed is a common response to realizing your child is struggling with reading and/or is dyslexic. It is a lot to take in. In my personal experience, even with knowing for years that dyslexia was prevalent in our extended family, and that it was completely possible to overcome the accompanying challenges, we struggled to accept that our children had dyslexia. We went through the various emotions of denial (not my child), frustration (she just needs to try harder, focus more), worry (will she ever be able to read? what about her future?), avoidance (she just needs more time, she isn’t ready yet), etc. And finally we settled down to face the challenge.

I won’t lie to you. There are no quick fixes or easy solutions. If anyone tells you that, they either don’t understand dyslexia fully, or they are trying to sell you on some solution that might address one part of the issue, but won’t cover all the bases. Dyslexia is a fundamentally different way of thinking, which has many advantages, but also makes some key skills like reading much more difficult to learn. People with dyslexia may or may not also have trouble with:

• spelling
• grammar
• writing
• math
• memorizing facts, studying for tests/exams
• telling time (analog clock)
• time management
• sequencing
• breaking large tasks or projects down into steps
• following directions
• reading a map or navigating
• mixing up left and right
• organization skills
• expressing themselves verbally

As you can see from this list, learning to read is only one of the possible challenges ahead. However, it isn’t all doom and gloom! Dyslexics are also often creative, innovative, curious, big picture thinkers, have excellent spatial skills, intuitive, entrepreneurial, great with their hands making or building things, and yes, even great speakers, writers, and communicators. The very thinking that makes some skills like reading difficult for them, also makes them uniquely skilled in other areas. It is just as important, probably more important, to help them discover their strengths as it is to identify their challenges. There are two sides to dyslexia, and you need to be consciously aware of both the strengths and challenges in order to meet the challenges and successfully overcome them.

Acknowledging that your child has dyslexia lifts a burden from both you and them. I know many people don’t want to label their child, but in our experience, and in the experiences I’ve heard from others, knowing that dyslexia is the reason for their challenges is a relief for most people. It is a common genetic variant that affects about 20% of the population, and it isn’t your fault. Accepting and owning this “label” of dyslexia helps both you and your child to reset your expectations and look for effective methods of learning, not trying to force the use of an ineffective method which results in frustration and failure. People with dyslexia are just as capable of learning as anyone else, but the methods commonly used in many schools does not fit with how they think. Just as you would not expect a child who is left handed to be forced to learn to write with their right hand, nor should you expect a child who has dyslexia to learn to read without an approach that fits with how they process information.

Where to next? This post is just the beginning of a series of posts continuing with the next steps I think are critical to setting you and your child up to successfully tackle the challenges raised by dyslexia. Over the next few weeks I’ll go into more detail on the following steps that were essential to us successfully meeting the challenges of dyslexia head on.

1. Now What?
2. Educate Yourself
3. Take the Pressure Off
4. Reading: A World of Adventure
5. Goals: Essential Roadmap
6. Get the Right Kind of Support
7. Persevere: Good Days and Bad
8. Nothing is Permanent Except Change
9. Encourage! Encourage! Encourage!

These steps worked for us. What worked for you? What questions do you have for me? Leave me a comment or send me an email. I’d love to hear what you are thinking.